Entry 038

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Unknown

Frustration is the emotion of the day.

I want to cry and let it all out,

I want to vent, 

And even though I know someone who would listen,

I can't vent successfully.

Grow up.

That's what you're supposed to do.

Everyone grows up one day.

They go to college,

Get a job, a career.

These are things I will do.

I don't know where to go, or what to do just yet;

It's unknown. I'm undecided.

It's not a crime to be undecided.

I'm under so much pressure.

They're slamming down hard on me to

Choose already, but I don't know,

I don't know,

I don't know,

I don't know,

Why can't everyone just leave me alone!?

Tears flow into my eyes.

I don't know. I just don't.

I don't know if I ever will know.

Apparently, that's a crime.

Do what you like, they say.

Whatever you like, make it your career.

I don't like anything.

I like to sleep. Eat. Watch TV. Simple things,

Mindless things

That can't be turned into careers.

I should know what I like, they say.

I should get my act together,

I need to figure it out,

I need to tell them so I can plan my future,

But I don't know.

I don't know, stop pressuring me already,

I don't know,

I just don't know,

GOD DAMNIT I DON'T KNOW.

LEAVE ME ALONE.

"Unknown," (c) Rebecca Grapentine, April 14th, 2011